Talking over your child

Getting Kids to Listen


By Rick Gostovich

To avoid talking over your child, try using some of the tips below.

.. Don’t have adult conversations around him: Before you launch into a
conversation with another adult, think about whether it is appropriate for young
ears to hear. If it isn’t, don’t have the conversation until they are nowhere to be
seen.

.. Don’t believe that he is engaged in play: I remember hearing a story from
a friend about her 3 year old. She was busy having a conversation with a friend
that was a bit negative about another person. They were busy complaining about
things that the third person did while her son colored on the floor below them.
Not a thought was given to her son, who they assumed was absorbed in his task,
that was until he looked up and commented in a most inappropriate manner,
about their conversation. It is a simple story but it really illustrates that even
when we think they are engaged, that they are actually listening.

.. Plan adult conversations for after hours: This is a very good point when it
comes to conversations with your partner. If you need to talk about something
your children can’t be an active part of, then set aside some time after they go to
bed to have the conversation.

.. Ask your child to leave the room: Sometimes life forces us to have an adult
conversation when your children are awake and it is okay to ask them to leave the
room for a few minutes or to find a space where you can talk. One of the best
ways is to engage them in an activity and then tell them that you will be right
back after your finished talking.

.. Have conversations that kids can be part of: This can be done when
people are visiting and it is perfectly okay. Children love to be part of the adult
scene and will be overjoyed that there is a conversation going on that they can be
part of. Sure, this may not be a big conversation and may simply be about a park
you visited but your child will appreciate being a part of it.